The Nongkhai Narrative

a.k.a. Tall Tales from Thailand

(Part 16)

  Published 23 March 2005

At the end of part 15 I included a picture of myself in the emergency department of a hospital in Udonthani. I wrote that the incident was the subject of an ongoing police investigation which I did not want to prejudice.

Some things do happen quickly in Thailand, and police involvement in the matter is now ended. I was the victim of a very violent attack in which I received a large number of punches and then kicks to my chest and face. The unprovoked attack from someone much bigger, stronger and younger than me, who I had previously considered a friend, came out of the blue. No plausible reason has been given for the attack (alcohol was not involved). A month later the cracked rib(s) and damaged nose are healing quite well. I have a lot of photos of my wounds, but I do not think that you want to see them here. Under Thai law, and with my assent, the perp (U.S. slang perpetrator) was able to avoid criminal charges by paying me a significant sum in compensation. I used the perp's money to pay the hospital bills, the police, to give a party for the friends who had been most supportive, and to make a donation to a nearby temple in Nongkhai.

In the picture a senior monk has just received our offering, and sprinkled us liberally with water. I know that there will be those that scoff at my Buddhist influenced approach to life. All I can say is that it works for me (and of course for most Thai people that I know). This week I met an Englishman who spends a lot of his time in Nepal. While he was there he met the Dalai Lama, although he had no idea who he was when he met him. He was telling me that ever since that meeting everything about his life has changed for the better. I wrote about the nature of coincidence in and

Although my life is strongly influenced by Buddhism, I think that there could be a subconscious reservoir of Old Testament Christianity, which seeks revenge in the form of 'an eye for an eye'. This is manifesting itself in the form of a recurring dream. In the dream the perp has grown even bigger and stronger, so there is even less chance of me doing to him what he did to me. So with a sort of poetic justice, I use the money paid by the perp to hire 2 or 3 men (the number varies from dream to dream) to do to him what he did to me, and thereby obtain revenge for me. Of course if something like this were to happen to the perp, I would be under suspicion, so in my dream the attack on him happens when I am far away in England.

It's funny the way dreams work.  But it is only a dream.   Isn't it?

Spookily a number of my friends in Nongkhai and Udonthani have quite independently offered to make my dream come true, but I have turned down their offers as I think that it is better that they are not involved when (and if) I get my biblical revenge.

When writing about Nong's (Valentine Day) birthday in the last episode, I said that she had reached 40 (one of those birthdays with a '0'). The source of my information was Nong herself, so I was a little surprised to be ridiculed by Derrick and Sam for getting it wrong. Ever the stickler for accuracy, I went and checked the official Thai record and found that yes, I was wrong. What I liked though was that Derrick and Sam who had ridiculed me, were also wrong. According to Thai records, Nong was born on 14/2/2510. Truly he who laughs last laughs longest.

After the meal, Dott and I headed to Glen's Outback Bar & Grill, where I proceeded to 'ring the bell' (picture left). In Thailand when you do this, you are signalling that you will buy everyone in the bar a drink, and nearly all bars provide a bell for this purpose.

One of the many things that makes Glen's bar special is that by 'ringing the bell' you join the Outback Bar & Grill Club, and have your name inscribed in red on a large mirror. Another thing that makes it special is the presence of Priscilla, a Vietnamese Pot-Bellied Pig, who has grown considerably since her first appearance at the opening night.

Priscilla is teaching Glen the rudiments of pig language. Conversations between Glen and Priscilla are very entertaining, but rather limited in content, as one of the participants is a lot more intelligent than the other. Still brains aren't everything, and luckily the one without the brains has the good looks.

Right, Glen, Yai & Priscilla. Who has the brains and who has the looks?

Priscilla enjoys being groomed while she chats with Glen

Apart from her conversations with Glen, Priscilla is not lonely as she has a rabbit (right) for a companion.

With Derrick and Nong away, and OJ's closed for a week, the meal I shouted for my friends took place at the Outback Bar & Grill. It was the first visit there for Major John, Wee Jimmy, and their respective wives. For Alannah it was also the first visit to a genuine Aussie bar, so while Dott, Lampai and Phon went shopping at the festival, Alannah tried a beer (below left).

Alannah has a firm grip on that bottle!

Glen worried whether his Baked Alaska will be a success. It was!

In The Complex, Alannah (nearly 2 months), and proud father

This chap lives across the road from us, next to some open land. As I was walking back from the town centre, I spotted him with this quite large snake. Apparently he had spotted it in a tree on the open land and had caught it. When I came along, he and his friend were working out what to do with it. I think that I would have left it in the tree!

We think that now the weather is warming up (April, May are the hottest months of the year), a lot of snakes which have been hibernating are now emerging and looking for a meal. Dott wasn't able to identify whether or not the snake was poisonous, but judging by the way it was being handled, my guess is that it was.

Christian's Savoy Reopens

Back in I wrote about Christian and his Savoy (Savoie) restaurant. You may recall that Christian comes from Chambery in the Savoie region of France. A number of us were disappointed when it closed earlier this year, but the good news is that it has reopened in a new location. Christian explained that he had had a lease for only one year on the previous premises, and had not been able to renew the lease on acceptable terms. Personally I prefer the new place, which has a more intimate feel, and as you can see in the photo of my wife on the right, is beautifully decorated.

But it's not only the premises which have changed. Christian has grown a beard, and unusually for older men like us, it really suits him. Compare this photo of Christian with ones published in earlier episodes, and you will see what I mean.

Dott and I dined there this week as she wanted the pork tenderloin in a green pepper sauce that Christian does so well. We are pleased to report that the high quality of his dishes has been maintained.

'Be nice to your Mum' was Glen's tip back in December. It's something I've tried to do, and it paid off when I pleaded for anyone who had a copy of Fahrenheit 9/11 to get in touch with me. Good old Mum came up trumps! She had videoed it and posted me the video once she had seen it herself. I've now seen the film, and I have nothing but admiration for Michael Moore. He is a man who loves his country but hates what George W. is doing to it (and incidentally doing to the rest of the world). I urge all people who can see beyond the end of their nose to watch this film. Another must is to visit his website www.michaelmoore.com

I have written attacking George W. in the past, and if my writing was a ripple on a pond, what Michael Moore has written and filmed would be a tsunami by comparison. What is unbelievable is that George W. was actually elected President after Fahrenheit 9/11 was released.

If anyone in Nongkhai wants to watch Fahrenheit 9/11 Virginia has it on VCD, while I have it on video cassette. On 10th January 2005 at the People's Choice Awards the film was named Best Picture of the Year.

 My Mum!

Michael Moore posted this letter the next day

Last night, at the People's Choice Awards, "Fahrenheit 9/11" was named the Best Movie of the Year. It was a stunning moment for us. And, somewhere inside the Bush White House, someone there must have been stunned, too.

21 million people voted in the People's Choice Awards. They chose our film over "Shrek 2," "Spiderman 2" and "The Incredibles." If we can beat that many superheroes, surely we can survive the next four years.

I can think of no greater honor for us this year than the award bestowed upon us last night by the American people. On live television, with no threat of my remarks being censored or cut short, I thanked all of you and the rest of our fellow Americans and dedicated the prize to the parents of our servicemen and women in Iraq, the Lila Lipscombs of America who suffer so profoundly by the reckless actions of the Bush administration.

(If you'd like to see what I said -- this time, no riot! -- you can click here. I even dressed up!)

It was an historic moment as no documentary had ever won the People's Choice Award for Best Picture. And I thank each and every one of you who voted and made that happen.

I took Congresswoman Maxine Waters and her husband as my guests last night. My family was there, too, as was some of our crew. We had a great time and I even got to meet Mel Gibson for the first time (he won a secondary prize for best film drama). More on that later!

Thanks again, and now let's get on with the serious work at hand -- winning more awards! Hahahaha. Just kidding. We have an inauguration to attend, don't we?

Yours,

Michael Moore
www.michaelmoore.com
MMFlint@aol.com

Crisis Four by Andy McNabb. Written before 9/11, there are a lot of insights in it. Coupled with the insights in Michael Moore's film, you cannot help but question the competence of the present U.S. administration. The book is available at The Outback Bar & Grill.